Listen people. There’s something you need to understand. I talk about pornography a lot on this blog. That isn’t likely to change. I don’t think people fully realize (or, are willing to acknowledge) how much an impact pornography is having on society. Ignoring it, or allowing the subject to remain faux pas, is no longer an appropriate response. The implications of pornography on society have reached critical mass. It’s time for this subject to come out into the open, not as a pet project of pop culture (as is currently the case) but as a topic of tremendous social and historical importance.
This was just to help you understand where I’m coming from. Now let me share something important, that you need to understand. Those who support the proliferation of pornography would have you believe that if you are a consumer of it, or have ever contributed to its production, then you are automatically one of them. It isn’t true. The battle lines have already been drawn. But it is not a battle between all those who produce & consume pornography versus those who don’t. The battle is between two rather different groups:
- Those who try to pretend that pornography is normal, and encourage its proliferation
- Those who acknowledge that pornography is wrong, damages lives, and unhealthy to society as a whole
Everything else is purely circumstantial.
If you are someone who consumes pornography, but feels guilty about doing so, who knows deep down inside that this habit is slowly siphoning away your humanity; you struggle with it and ultimately wish it weren’t a part of your life – then you are actually on the side of good. It’s just a matter of finding a way to break free of it through whatever means you can find.
If you are one of the tens of thousands of young women who have allowed yourself to become a product of pornography, but you know what you did (or are doing) is wrong, you regret it, and you wish that men weren’t so eager to see or have you be used this way – then you are also on the side of good. It’s just a matter of finding a way to break free of it by whatever means you can find.
To both of you; listen to me. Don’t let your connection to pornography enable the bad guys to deceive you into thinking you are one of them. You aren’t. It just so happens you have gotten caught up in the web of it all. Do you honestly think you’re alone? Believe me. You’re not. I bet (to all of you) not a single person reading this hasn’t had their lives touched, in one way or another, by pornography. Maybe you are one of the thousands upon thousands of people who have been raped or molested by a person addicted to pornography. Maybe you’re just one of the many millions of dumb men, who have been drawn into consuming it. If you still have a conscience it’s tearing you up isn’t it…you’re not alone. Maybe you’re one of the millions of women whose husband or boyfriend is addicted to pornography and tries to win your tacit approval of his habit. Maybe he’s succeeded, but deep down you feel that there’s something not entirely healthy about this, or just plain wrong with it; but so far you’ve been too afraid to do anything about it. Maybe you’re not sure whether he’s “into” pornography but your sex life has taken some bizarre, even disturbing turns in recent years. Follow your instinct on this. Just because you don’t know for sure, doesn’t mean your gut isn’t telling you something. Ask him flat out and look him straight in the eye. You’ll know. Maybe you’re one of the many thousands of young woman who hear people at school talking about it (like it’s no big deal because everybody is into it – especially the cool people) and have even allowed yourself to get caught up in imitating what the popular young men have been consuming. Just because something’s “popular” doesn’t mean it’s normal or healthy. Maybe you’re a teacher or a public figure, or someone in the social services or law enforcement, who sees first hand all of this playing out before your eyes, and already sees the connection between pornography and so much destructive behavior. You see the connection, but feel intimidated about making the connection publicly because you and so many of your colleagues have had a personal connection to the very thing. Stop letting that matter so much; we can’t afford to let things continue this way.
It may not have always been the case, but as of right now, a decade into the 21st century, pornography has affected (whether we like it or not) each of our lives. And every one of us has to choose which side of the issue we are going to be on. Don’t let yourself be deceived. Which side you choose doesn’t have to be based on your circumstances (or past mistakes). It’s based on a conscious decision that you are free to make any time you wish. Those who try to pretend that pornography is normal, and encourage its proliferation, are on the side of evil…regardless of whether they consume it. Those who acknowledge that pornography is wrong, and damages lives, and (ultimately) don’t want it a part of their life, are on the side of good…regardless of whether they consume it, or have consumed it, or have contributed to its production.
One way or another pornography is here to stay…Even if we made it illegal. One way or another, for the foreseeable future, it will remain part of American pop culture, and in some way affect each of our lives. The only thing that differentiates us from one another is where we choose to stand on the issue.
Something else to bear in mind. You don’t have to be a Christian or a ‘religious person’ to see that pornography is wrong, that it damages lives and degrades our culture. These things are independently true. Even the most astute Atheist can see there is something intrinsically wrong with producing or consuming images of another person being degraded and humiliated.
Those who are for pornography want all of us to believe another lie too, that pervasiveness equals power. They are wrong on this point as well. There should be nothing surprising about the pervasiveness of pornography, especially when you combine the internet age with widespread social relativism (and human nature). But when it comes to deciding a position the pervasiveness doesn’t matter. Each person has the power to make up his or her own mind, despite their individual circumstances. That’s you and me and every other person, regardless of our connection to pornography, past or present, in whatever form.
The line in the sand has already been drawn. Which side are you going to choose?
Further thoughts are offered in a later post – Changing the Subject